Aaaaaand it’s over!


Australia, that plucky country, sixth overall. Yet there will be a few furrowed brows and forced smiles among our Olympics Committee members as they begin their haruspication for Paris 2024.

Never satisfied, those crusty bastards.

We’re choking on ‘golden moments’ stories. Until the dying gasp, China led the gold tally overall. Americans must’ve hated that. It’s why US media arranged their daily tally by total medals won, not by gold. Pure ego. But they caught their nemesis in the end.

China sent 777 athletes to Tokyo, the US sent 613, Australia 486. Yet despite the numerical odds, it was Australian Emma McKeon who was the most successful Olympian overall. There was infinitely more commentary about quitter Simone Biles, though, but that’s MSM bias for ya.

Nobody in the world crunches numbers like gambling websites, who ovewhelmingly tipped Simone Biles (US) gymnastics, Caeleb Dressel (US) swimming, Laura Kenny (UK) cycling, Kylie Massey (CAN) swimming, and Teddy Riner (FRA) judo as best-bets for Olympic gold. Which just proves that gambling is for fools.

Among the irrelevant Olympic lists that inevitably emerge, I’m not sure I wanted all the LGBTQ athletes to be outed. BTW, why only three males on the list? Is it because lesbians are still trendier / sexier / more socially-acceptable than gay men? Awful lot of girl+girl action in the Olympic Village!

Explains why some were too tired to get among the medals, maybe.

Anyway, well done to the world’s most unsuccessful Olympic nation — India — for bringing home one gold, two silver and four bronze. Best performance ever. Neeraj Chopra’s gold for javelin is only the nation’s second, and catapults him to superstardom. A spear-chucking Virat Kohli. Not bad for a fat kid off a farm.

The Olympics was a useful distraction from COVID’s relentless march, and gave us numbers to be happy about for a change. The number that impressed me most, of course, was Karsten Warholm’s destruction of a record that stood for almost 30 years. That and Andrew Hoy’s eighth (that’s right 8th) Olympics, adding silver and bronze to his haul.

I’m less impressed by the romper-room antics of prepubescent gymnasts, skateboarders, and table-tennis players than Hoy’s medals aged 62. We act as if young athletes are something new, yet 13 year-old Marjorie Gestring won Olympic gold for diving in 1936. Maybe Simone Biles wouldn’t be a burned-out shell aged 24 if they hadn’t start coaching her aged 8.

One thing the gambling sites can predict with certainty is that Biles is now done. She’ll be in the commentary box for NBC Sports in 2024, defending that nude spread she did for Sports Illustrated (‘empowering a whole generation of Black women‘) while sniping at Russian prodigy Svetlana / Yevgeniya / Oksana whetever for getting a perfect 10.

But that’s sports for ya. Bring on Beijing 2022!

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