Is it telling that I’m typing “WTF?” a lot more as I get older?

This time it’s Emma Louise Corrin, notable only for her star role in the most recent season of The Crown (2020) who has decided she’s unhappy being a girl. To be fair, she’s not unhappy being a girl all the time, she just wants the option of being a boy when it suits her.

Or neither? Or both, maybe!

I can’t keep up.

Chest binding, apparently, is what you do when you’re flirting with the idea of being a boy. I approve: Don’t get the lovely-jubblies surgically removed unless you’re absolutely sure! Of course, change of mind remains an option for Emma. So much harder to reverse a depenising.

And to be fair, it’s just revenge for all that silliness during the Shakespearean Age when a girl couldn’t get an acting gig for love nor money. In future, only women will be able to get acting jobs. After that, we’ll erase the cultural artefact of ‘gender’ completely, and your biological sex at birth will be as irrelevant as the colour of your hair.

Yay, progress.

Shame though, I thought Emma made a good female. Better than that Ellen Elliot Page. If non-binary had been trending twenty years ago, you know Jamie-Lee Curtis would have been James. Next we’ll hear Alexandra Daddario has bought two-hundred yard of spandex.

So Emma becomes… Eamon? Emil? Elmo?

Sam Hayek.

Harry Berry.

Chris Hendricks.

Sonny Vergara? God kill me now. There won’t be anything left to watch if the best boobs in Hollywood belong to Jonah Hill. Maybe by then it’ll be Jenny Hill anyway, along with Josie Momoa, and Clint Eastwood.

Ah ah! I know what you’re thinking: Like Clint Eastwood would ever change his name!

Anyway, I’m off to buy some shares in DuPont.

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