My second-favourite country in the world, France, is balls-deep in the 2022 election campaigns of a motley ensemble of candidates. But the contenders are thinning, as a recent poll suggests:

Political scientist Gaspard Estrada, confirms there’s nothing in the numbers that would trouble Manu. Especially as far-right opponents Le Pen and Zemmour are busy squabbling among themselves. This suits Manu fine, and allows him to plays European strongman in the Ukraine standoff.

At a time when the right-wing vote is historically high, it’s telling that the Fascists still need ALL of the right-wing votes to unseat Macron.

Le Pen suffered a fatal blow when Marion Maréchal, her uber-popular niece, came out publicly in support of Zemmour. I’d say this public statement heralds the end of the Le Pen political dynasty: ‘If I support Eric, it won’t just to be to stick my head and say hello,’ says Marion.

Wink-wink. Marion’s back.

Imagine Marion Maréchal and Eric Zemmour on the same Fascist ticket! Sarah Knafo will be pissed, but what do you do. La belle et la bête is a promoter’s dream. She needs to declare herself for Zemmour soon, though, because the old fella is losing it.

Manu’s most serious challenger is Valérie Pécresse of Les Républicains. Centre-right, she’s after the votes of those who oppose same-sex marriage, LGBT parenting, immigration, civil servants, and the unemployed.

Pécresse also likens herself to Margaret Thatcher. Yep, said that in public. Obviously a political noob, Pécresse hopes to capitalize on existential Gallic gloom and become the republic’s first female president.

Because why not. By all accounts Manu remains popular, has done a good job all things considered, and hasn’t disgraced himself in any spectacular way. But that’s irrelevant when national moodiness towards politics turns sour.

Diabolical, even.

My advice to the jaded French, even in an election year you can find something to make you smile. Google “macron antichrist” and enjoy the hundreds of .com’s where crazy internet people will try to convince you that Macron is the devil. Utterly hilarious.

Why are the nuttiest people on the planet always religious?

The same zany funsters also claimed Bill Gates was the Antichrist. Or was it Dr Fauci? No, wait, it was Jared Kushner! Or the Pope. Every US President was the Antichrist according to these loons; but Pastor Robert Jeffress at the First Baptist Church in Dallas qualifies:

I am not saying that President Obama is the Antichrist, I am not saying that at all. One reason I know he’s not the Antichrist is the Antichrist is going to have much higher poll numbers when he comes,” said Jeffress.

Oh, god.

I’m not sure if I’m laughing with them or at them. Okay, at them. But in a couple months we’ll know if Emmanuel Macron’s poll numbers are diabolically high. Maybe then he will fulfill his infernal ambition.

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