While SARS-CoV-2 variant B.1.1.529 has been allocated the ugliest letter of the Greek alphabet, I must insist on making a distinction between ‘The Big O’ and ‘The Big Zero’.
The latter is reserved for our new Premier, Dominic Parrothead.
The Big Zero threw caution to the wind when he slid into the power vacuum created by the Fall of St Gladys — for dirty dancing with dastardly Darryl — virtually unopposed, almost as if the others knew something he didn’t…
Since then, Parrothead has busied himself ripping off facemasks and throwing the state open to international travellers — including at least 100 from the affected African regions — insisting the worst is behind us, we have to learn to live with the virus, and/or God will save us.
Maybe the Big Zero should have spent less time impregnating his exhausted wife and more time reading the news. The new variant has been varying for months. By hoarding vaccines (Astra Zeneca, anyone?), the First World created a Third World reservoir for the coronavirus to do what it does best: mutate.
This is our fault.
The WHO are now calling The Big O a variant of concern. That means it’s more transmissible, or more virulent, or that our current regime of treatments are ineffective against it. Don’t forget that the ‘ors’ can also be ‘ands’ — so the B.1.1.529 virus might be all three — thus orders of magnitude worse than Delta.
The Big Apple’s first female governor, Cathy Hochul, has already declared a state of emergency, and to make the point has recently released health data which Andrew Cuomo appears to have suppressed: 55,400 COVID deaths in NY alone.
Newsflash, Parrothead — THIS is what “learning to live with it” looks like:
On December 15, The Big Zero will be urging all of New South Wales to whip off their masks, take a big deep breath, and get about the business of pumping money in our all-important economy and generating tax dollars for the gub’mint.
Excuse me if I don’t follow his advice just yet. I’m waiting to see what comes out of Africa, because The Big Zero may yet live up to the first nickname he was publicly (and perhaps presciently) given — The Undertaker.