I figure our CV-19 seclusion is the perfect time for the long-awaited sequel to this post, so here’s the (2013) original to whet your appetite …

ERIK KAISSON

Ever wanted to be the most unpopular person in the room? Need some techniques to max-out that precious alone-time?  Maybe you know one of those self-contained biblical Job-types whose patience sorely needs testing? Well, fellow annoyers and persona non grata wannabes, pin back your ears and listen up, because here are my top tips for being the person others don’t want you to be.

Always get to work first and be the last to leave, and make sure everybody knows about it. When your co-workers arrive exhausted by the traffic, mention how good your commute was an hour before dawn.  When people get ready to leave, pointedly check your watch but say nothing.  Just mutter something about ‘workload’ and hurry out of the room with the Pensky file under your arm. You are, of course, just going to the now-empty Lactation Room to play Monument Valley until everybody else…

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