I’ve toned down the rhetoric a bit lately, mostly because taking offense has become an art form and I’m bored by the faux outrage. I just want a quiet life, so I missed the news that a transgender woman Rikkie Valerie Kolle was crowned Miss Netherlands.

Runner-up was a cisgender woman named Nathalie Mogbelzada.

Officially triggered.

Maybe I put my eyes in backward this morning but I think the judges fucked-up, because in no alternate reality is Rickie more beautiful than Nathalie.


Does that mean I’m a hater?

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No longer matters.

Meet Anne Jakapong Jakrajutatip, the Thai celebrity media tycoon who owns the Miss Universe competition. A transgender woman herself, her aim is to evolve the comp “for the next generation” unquote.

So, who will be Miss Universe 2023 do you think?


No, silly, that’s Bruce-I-mean-Caitlyn! Yes I know dead-naming = hater. But unless there’s another transgender woman in the running the smart money is on Rikkie.

But (being a pedant) can I ask for one tiny change to be made before we go through the charade? Remove the word ‘Miss’ from the title. It is offensive. Henceforth the competition must be named the ‘Mx Universe Competition’

At the end of the day, chicks with dicks don’t bother me. I like everybody until they give me a reason not to. If Daniel wants to amputate his penis and call himself Danielle, henceforth she is Danielle to me.

I have zero emotion about it.

I have even less emotion/interest in beauty competitions. I thought they’d disappeared with the dinosaurs, but apparently some orange fuckwit kept them alive.

Nice one, fool.

Like herpes, the Mx Universe beauty competition is here to stay.

At least it has been dragged out of the shallows by Anne ‘just the tip’ Jakrajutatip, and as hard as I’m trying, I can’t make fun of this.

Somehow despite my natural cynicism I think this is a good thing.

Well done, Anne.

I once rode down a hill on my bike, lost control and fell off. My skinned knee, raw and bleeding, embedded with gravel, was better looking than Rikkie Valerie Kolle.

But I still hope she wins, because — you know — fuck this shit.

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